– Sorry, I’m just in a bad mood.
— Oh. Okay. Are you on your period?
– Excuse me?
— If you’re in a bad mood. That would explain it.
– Sure. I can’t think of any other reason I might be in a bad mood. Maybe it’s because I’m tired, or hungry. Maybe it’s because I looked at the news this morning. Maybe it’s just because you’re a dick.
— That was uncalled for.
– Was it?
— We barely know each other. You have no right to insult me.
– And yet, you obviously think we know each other well enough that it’s acceptable for you to ask if I am bleeding from my vagina. Huh. Funny.
— Which you clearly are.
— I mean, you haven’t said that you aren’t…
– What if I am?
– Would you want me to tell you about it?
— It wouldn’t bother me.
– Great! So you wouldn’t mind me complaining about the fact I’m at the very beginning, so my flow is super heavy and I need to wear a tampon AND a pad to stop leaks?
— Why would you tell me that?
– You said it wouldn’t bother you.
— Jeeze, I was just trying to be nice. I didn’t think you’d take it so literally.
– Yeah, well, congrats. It’s that kind of day.
— I was right though.